How to make Gargoyle Grilled Cheese Sandwiches

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The Ingredients

• Sourdough bread

• Buitoni brand pesto sauce

• Buitoni brand marinara sauce

• Cream cheese

• Sliced provolone

• Sliced mozzarella

• Shredded Romano cheese

• Mayonnaise (not Miracle Whip)

• Garlic Powder

• Italian Seasoning

• Lots and lots of napkins

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^{Glamour shot of fancy ingredients}

The Steps

1. In a mixing bowl, combine equal parts cream cheese and pesto and mix well.

2. Spread the cream cheese/pesto mix on the "inside" of each slice of bread.

3. On one slice of bread, place sliced mozzarella.

4. On the other slice of bread, place sliced provolone.

5. Spread marinara sauce on one of the two slices of bread, on top of the sliced cheese.

6. Sprinkle some shredded Romano cheese on top of the marinara sauce.

7. Put the slices together.

8. "Butter" the outside of the bread with mayonnaise, then dust the mayonnaise with garlic powder and Italian seasoning.

9. Grill on a hot pan or skillet until the cheese is melty and bread is golden brown.

10. Consume. You will need napkins.

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^{Making sandwiches on a camp stove at an SCA event. Photo by Jonathan Levy.}

 

The History

This recipe is a modified version of the TMNT Grilled Cheese published by Geek With Curves. Most notably, I left out the pizza rolls due to logistical difficulties; when you bit into the sandwich, the pizza rolls had a tendency to squirt out the opposite side of the sandwich. To substitute, I used sliced mozzarella cheese. I also swapped the ciabatta bread for sourdough slices, then worked my own magic with the mayonnaise, garlic powder, and Italian seasoning.

I once seduced half a kingdom with these sandwiches in attempt to impress one person (it worked, and that person and I dated for three happy years).

A meal of four sandwiches was once auctioned off in a fundraiser for the Kingdom of Caid (the winning bid was $55).

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^{Screenshot of the silent auction Facebook post, including photo by Jonathan Levy.}

Why “Gargoyle” Grilled Cheeses?

These aren’t regular grilled cheeses, so they needed a name. I really love gargoyles, so I called them “Gargoyle Grilled Cheeses.” It has a nice ring to it, too! And during one event, I drew a mascot on the back of a paper plate:

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^{The original grilled cheese gargoyle, sketched on the back of a paper plate.}

The Melting Goes Ever On

Not content to rest on the laurels of a killer backstory, I’ve been making these grilled cheeses a few times a year during festivals held at a local small business called Pixie’s Intent. My first event with them was in 2019. When the weather isn’t prohibitively hot (and after a long break during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic), I set up a table and make grilled cheeses on a donation basis (the donation is to offset the cost of ingredients). I do this as a form of community service; I love making these sandwiches and seeing people’s reaction. Shop regulars (and staff!) look forward to this special treat, and it warms my heart to be able to share the joy of these sandwiches with others. That’s why the documentation for this recipe is free to all!

Gallery

More pictures of grilled cheese shenanigans!

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^{One of my first Pixie’s Intent festival setups, December 2019. Photo courtesy of Pixie’s Intent.}

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^{February 2020. Photo courtesy of Pixie’s Intent.}

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^{Event flyer made for me by Susanna Hill, the event planner at Pixie’s Intent.}

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^{Return of the grilled cheeses after the pandemic hiatus! Vaccinated & masked for everyone’s safety. April 2022. Photo courtesy of Pixie’s Intent.}

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^{“Griddle at the griddle!” Cosplaying as Gideon the Ninth while making grilled cheeses in October 2022. (Without gloves only for the photo op.) Photo by Susanna Hill.}

 

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^{October 2022. (Without gloves only for the photo op.) Photo by Susanna Hill.}

 

TikTok Videos

I was feeling silly during the February 2023 event, so I recorded a couple of TikTok videos.